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Traveling with #lovenotcontrol

September 11, 2018

🛫🕞 'not many people can say they had a wonderful time traveling' 💖💫 


When I say this I don't mean 'travelling' as in 6 months around the world, use of the word (in my dreams)🌏. No I mean actually getting up at 2.45A.M, to catch a plane that's delayed for an hour and then sits on the tarmac for......EVERRRR haha. You know, that kind of traveling.

So why did I have 'a wonderful day' ? why do I want to remember it rather than forget it and why do I feel compelled to write about it?.....

I truly and deeply beleive it's because of #lovenotcontrol ♡.

LET GO & LISTEN. Let go of wanting and needing to control. If you can do this you will feel sooooooooo much lighter, calmer, happy and empowered. This can be hard to do at times but with practice you can do it.

 

 So here's the thing. My little chap is 2 (nearly 3)and one if his absolute favourite things is to run. He gets so much from being able to do this. At the airport at 4.30 a.m that's what he wanted and needed to do. He'd sat in the car, sat through check in, helped me and others with the bag checks and now he wanted to move, he wanted to run. 


There was space so I let him run. He ran past the cafe of people, past the waiting area seats, past the bar and shops and back again. He was minding anyone that was in his path and was running with a beaming smile radiating happiness to the world.

I walked or jogged with him and we had a great time chatting and looking at things as we ran lap after lap. We were getting rid of our wriggles and jiggles, giving our sensory system  some important input before our flight. More than this we were building positive memories and Bonding.

You see we didn't try and 'control'. Instead we loved and we helped him to receive what he needed which then opened up sooo many wonderful learning experiences for us to explore. 

On the plane I went with love again. He sat fir a looong time playing and exploring. 

Towards the end of the flight Ren was wrestles. His legs needed to move. So once the trolley passed he walked  up and down the isle and then he jogged. A man smiled at me and I smiled back and said. " I think a bit of jogging is better than an upset toddler waking everyone up'. He smiled again, gave Ren a high 5 and said ' oh absolutely....and he's great at running' . A lady then chirped in 'oh yes running is so much better than loud screaming and crying. it's nice to see him so happy'.


Now at this point you will either be with me or thinking oh wow.....she's has no 'control over her child'. The way I see it is like this....  what would be better? To upset 1 miserable person (I'm not aware that there were any at the airport or on the plane by the way) who would rather see your child having an emotional melt down or to let go of the need to conform with square bottoms on square seats. He will learn to  sit quietly in time (I'm pretty sure at 18 he will be sat beautifully in his seat on the plane haha).

 

LoveNotControl is not about ignoring your childs behaviour its about  listening to their needs, helping them to learn and keeping the space you are in as calm as you can.  Go with love for them as much as for you and everyone around you and your hearts will float 💖

 

xx Colette xx

 

** 

This is not a post about me portraying myself as a perfect mum. We have had toddler tantrums and I've made mistakes in not planning an evening properly which lead to a tantrum. But I try and learn from every experience AND loveNotControl helps me to stay calm through these events and offer a reliable, safe and loving base for my Little one. 

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